Arte Moreno’s Checkbook Goes Missing, Angels Sign Pujols and C.J. Wilson

Pujols-angels

In a move only people who wear foil hats and eat out of dumpsters could have predicted, the Los Angeles Angels have laid out a 10 year $254 million deal that will bring Albert Pujols to Disneyland, and another $77.5 million over 5 years to convince Rangers stud, C.J. Wilson to join an already star-studded rotation that features Dan Haren, Jered Weaver, and Ervin Santana.

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Houston Astros Sale Will Move Team From NL to AL

jim crane astros

According to the Associated Press, a person familiar with the deal that has Houston businessman, Jim Crane, purchasing the Astros from Drayton McLane will also move the team from the N.L. Central to the A.L. West. The Astros have been in the N.L. since 1962, but by moving to the A.L., the league would have a 15/15 balance that Bud Selig has been openly promoting on Twitter.

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Angels, Weaver Agree to 5 Year $85 Million Extension

jered weaver

Yahoo Sports is reporting that Jered Weaver and the Angels have agreed to a 5 year $85 million contract that would keep the Ace from testing the free agent market at the end of next season.

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[VIDEO] Angels’ Weaver to Get Six Game Suspension for Throwing at Alex Avila

jered-weaver-defiant-241x300

The gentlemen of Major League Baseball have unwritten rules of etiquette when it comes to admiring your own home run and David Ortiz-like bat flips as they stroll to first base.

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People/News Publications that Think Angels Win over Rangers Equates to Hope are Lazy and Stupid

anaheim angels fan

The L.A. Angels of Anaheim via San Bernardino of Jalisco Inland Empire rallied from an 8-3 deficit to beat the Texas Rangers tonight, prompting lazy stupid writers like Helen Elliott of the L.A. Times to post absurd articles titled ‘Angels take a firm step in the right direction’, despite the fact that Artie Moreno is still the owner, and the Angels are still 4 games behind the Rangers in the A.L. West (the only division in baseball that the Angels could ever compete for).

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Angels Swallow Pride and $14.5 Million, Cut Scott Kazmir

scott kazmir

After a stellar start to his career in Tampa Bay, Scott Kazmir’s career has done a full Lohan and found itself face down in the gutter with it’s vagina exposed to the world.

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Angels Fans Make the Guinness Book of World Records

angels wrestling mask world record

Last night, fans at Angels Stadium made history by becoming the largest ever gathering of people wearing wrestling masks.

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One Fat At-Bat, Bobby Jenks vs. Bobby Abreu

bobby jenks and bobby abreu

This has got to be one of the fattest at-bats I’ve seen in a long time. (Minus every time David Ortiz has faced C.C. Sabathia and Bartolo Colon this season.)

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Angels’ Jered Weaver Pranks Star Rookie Mike Trout

mike-trout

One of the unwritten rules of spring training, is that rooks “only speak when spoken to”. No. 1 prospect, Mike Trout, is learning that the hard way.

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