You Need New Friends Dude

Allegedly Quanis Phillips, a co-defendant in the Michael Vick dog fighting case and one of the attendees of Michael Vick’s 30th birthday party, tapped the hand of Vick’s wife while she was feeding him cake, causing Vick to get cake on his face, which started an altercation. Later in the night Phillips was shot and taken to the hospital.

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Government Steps In to Break Up Monopoly In Miami.

There is a little more than a day left until the biggest NBA free-agency in history can begin, and I just can’t wait until it is over. I can go on TMZ right now and find out what color underwear Britney Spears is wearing, if she is in fact wearing any, but reporters have really only been able to come up with rumors and scenarios about Lebron for months. Lebron, Wade, and Bosh the three major pieces of this off season met two discuss possible options, one of which being an aligning of all three stars in Miami.

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FIFA Calls In Stadium Replays of Blown Calls ‘A Mistake’

Instead of looking for ways to correct the blown calls at the World Cup, FIFA has decided that it will simply try to keep fans at the World Cup from seeing their mistakes.

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Blown Calls Are Ruining the World Cup

The poor refs can’t see everything, but we have technology that can help them. If instant replay was available when soccer was invented, I guarantee the people who invented soccer would have used it. Why can’t we?

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Jerk of The Week

At 11 hours and 5 minutes Nicolas Mahut played in the longest tennis match of all time against John Isner. The 5th and final set, that mercifully ended at 70-68, was longer than any previous match in tennis history. And after all those hours there had to be a loser, and Nick, you let it be you.

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Juergen Klinsmann Caught Doing Lines of Prozac on ESPN Set

ESPN soccer analyst and former German player and coach, Juergen Klinsmann was caught doing lines of Prozac on the ESPN set only moments before going on air after Italy’s loss to Slovakia.

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Plaschke’s Corner

Maybe it does not always make sense, but I refuse to deviate from my recipe for success, especially not after the USA’s victory in the World Cup. While the rest of the country is elated by the win on the brink of elimination, I think we should just be releaved.

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U.S. Soccer Wins Group, Advances to Knockout Round of World Cup

While Kim Jong-il’s North Korea and Napolean’s France are at the bottom of their respective groups and headed home to their crappy countries, Team America is headed to the Knockout stage as group winners for the first time since 1930. Let’s see how much has changed since the last time the U.S. team won their group in the World Cup.

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Lady Guy Guy Crashes Yankee Club House

Lady Guy Guy attended the subway series between the Yanks and Mets, attending games at both stadiums. At Yankee stadium she decided to sport an open jersey with a bikini under it, then got plastered and stumbled around the Club house, where she slurred and spit on the players she met, and I am sure unsuccessfully threw herself at them.

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