A-Rod’s Paperboy Interviewed by FBI

While the FBI was sitting outside of A-Rod’s house yesterday looking for needles in his trash and scooping samples from his dog’s poop in the yard, they noticed that the neighborhood paperboy was throwing the Times a little further and with a lot more accuracy than usual.

Soon after the boy’s arrest, rumors were everywhere that A-Rod’s paperboy had been supplying the Yankee 3rd baseman with PEDs since grade school. Congressmen, that were originally elected during the Civil War, back the allegations.

A-Rod was unavailable for comment and is still reluctant to leave his penthouse since he found out Madonna was a man.